Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Memories Make It Better

Ok, in my defense I didn't get out of the doctor until almost 6:30. :) I'm kind of up in the air with my feelings right now. Everything looked pretty much the same as last time but an area either in or next to my bladder lit up on the scan. The report said that it was suggested to have the bladder examined. So, our next step is to set up the procedure with Baptist. The clinic was already closed at 6:00 but hopefully we can get it done as soon as possible. They will look to see if it's possibly nothing or if they can see lesions or tumors once they get in there. Let's pray my bladder had a mind of its own on Monday and that everything will be fine.  I don't think I will be fully satisfied until all of that is done and over! I'm trying not to panic until I know for sure.

Chemo brain is driving me crazy! The three of us took a little get away last weekend and every day there were several ridiculous moments. I'll highlight the top three. Saturday I woke up feeling pretty good and happy with myself. We all started getting dressed and Allie and I decided to have a race to see who could brush our teeth the fastest. Going fine....brusha brusha brusha and Alan walks in. "SUMMER, you are using my toothbrush!"  While I start gagging and am totally grossed out he is jabbering, "I mean, how did you not know....I mean, my toothbrush is blue and yours is lime green...I mean, mine has so and so grip and yours has so and so grip." Ok buddy...you haven't used anyones toothbrush, I just used yours so put a sock in it.  Seriously...who is the victim here?  I am hanging over the toilet gagging. I know some people think it's fine and dandy but not me. URRRP...sorry I just got sick thinking about it. lol.

That was nothing. Let's move on to Saturday night. Laying asleep in the middle of the night. Alan jumps up..."Summer...something warm just hit my back." He's up flipping on the light and running around and looking crazy. We had a king bed for all of us and apparently Allie got sick...right on Alan's back. I was so happy it wasn't me, lol, until what happened next. I peeled my eyelids off of my contacts only to find steak and corn throw up all in our bed. Ha ha. So that ended up being my part in this whole catastrophe. I jump up ripping off the sheets at 3 or 4 in the morning. Here's the best part. When I filled out my reservation I just said..."2 adults, King please." So in the middle of the night I called to the front desk..."Ummm...yes...can I have some clean sheets sent up to my room." Lady says "What do you mean clean sheets?" I don't understand why that was a question. What else could I mean? I said "I need clean sheets, a fitted and flat sheet, sent to our room." Lady: "Ooookay...? Do you need anything else?  Do you need pillow cases too?" So, I set the phone down to check them and came back and said, "Well, yes I need one. Well...wait a minute... let me see if there is anything on the other one. Yeah there is some on the other one too." We finally communicated and I hung up. OH MY GOSH! It was the middle of the night, I was half asleep and then realized I didn't tell her that my daughter was sick and it was all in the bed and that's why we needed sheets. I am very conservative and it was obvious after the fact that this lady thought something totally different was going on in room 235! I told the old man when he came to the door but of course Allie was passed out under the comforter so it looked like she didn't exist. I couldn't even sleep after that. How embarrassing? :)  :)

And last but not least, day three. We are on our way home and decide to go through a drive thru because we were starving. Allie wanted McDonald's and Alan hates McDonalds. I pulled my map up on my phone and found something for him and her right next to each other. So off we go. I'm giving directions telling Alan to take exit 39B or whatever it was. "Go left, take a right, blah blah blah." After all, it was right off the interstate so we could be in and out in no time at all. Ten minutes off of the exit we are still looking and turning and he's frustrated and I'm hollering..."It should be right here." It was only 1 mile after the exit and we had been driving more than 10 or 15 minutes looking for it. Alan said, "Just, just, just...just give me my phone! Don't talk, give me my phone. SUMMER, where are we? This is 10 miles out of the way." I was going back and forth with him telling him to look at my phone, my phone cant be wrong. After 5 or 6 MORE minutes, chemo moment, I realized I had my phone flipped upside down! Every turn to the left should have been to the right and so on. We ate our food quietly after that. lol

The point of all of that was to say those annoying "Chemo Brain" moments make me so happy today when I'm feeling kind of uncertain about things.

Please continue prayers until I can work through this procedure. Love you all!


  1. Still praying for you and just wondering if I should have been laughing at your 3 chemo brain moments? Well I was and they aren't really chemo brain moments b/c I can see all 3, especially the upside down phone happening with my family.